As an organization, the White Sox have a lot of flaws, but no one can say that they aren’t at least incredibly charitable. And the best fundraising charity event they have each year is when the players’ significant others get together and make up the Favorite Things Baskets.
I love this event. In the past we were fortunate enough to learn that Orlando Hudson loves cuff links and Mentos, Alex Rios enjoys the literature of Ayn Rand, and Matt Thornton thinks portable wine coolers are the bees’ knees.
So what are some standouts this year?
Chris Sale: Sale has had a bottle of Crown Royal in his basket every year. This year he added 50 oz worth of expensive ramblers to drink it out of.
Jose Abreu: Did you know that Jose Abreu apparently adores dogs? I did not. But he likes them so much that his basket contains a White Sox leash, a White Sox bowl, a Kong toy, and specially made dog peanut butter. Which is good, because if your peanut butter contains xylitol, you’re going to kill your dog.
Robin Ventura: I get that pasta is apparently Robin’s favorite food, but including noodles and red sauce in a charity basket feels kind of weird. But he also has noise-cancelling headphones which are great for wearing when the masses are calling for your head.
Carlos Rodon: Carlos’ basket has me mildly concerned. Three of the items are different types of odor masking/removing agents. Is Carlos Rodon the smelliest man in baseball?
Matt Albers: Matt Albers likes to drink and grill, which is the least surprising news ever. He also has terrible taste in movies (no one likes Anchorman 2) and strangely enough included an autographed ball from Chris Sale in his basket. Huh.
Nate Jones: An autographed Todd Frazier ball. Our relief pitchers are in awe of their betters.
Adam Eaton: Eaton is the grindiest man alive since Darin Erstad merged back with the dirt he was born from, so naturally all of his favorite things are game worn items and Big League Chew. Adam spends his free time wishing there were more baseball games to play. I worry about him.
David Robertson: Holy hell, does the closer like to fish. Robertson is legitimately setting someone up with enough fishing gear that they will not have to spend money on anything other than beer and a boat (and he even threw in some beers too).
Jimmy Rollins: Rollins’ basket is the most boring of the bunch except for three samples of Creed cologne. Not three bottles, but three samples. Jimmy is giving till it hurts.
Jerry Sands: Oh man, this is just sad. He should have put “being in the majors” on his list. Maybe they wouldn’t have cut him.
Austin Jackson: A-Jax likes coconut water and terrible TV shows. No one should watch Gotham, much less own it on DVD.
Alex Avila: Avila is super into cooking. Like, way more than you’d think anyone who makes that much money and lives half their life on the road would be. Good for him. I like to cook too.
Dan Jennings: A bunch of autographs from players you actually like and some camping gear.
Brett Lawrie: Wine, golf supplies, and Red Bull. Yeah, that fits like a glove.
Zach Duke: A bunch of inspirational books, perfect for reinventing yourself after fizzling out.
Southpaw: Hell yes. Southpaw’s basket gives you tickets to childhood Mark’s favorite place in the world (Brookfield Zoo) and tickets to a Sox game during which he will come hangout with you. Southpaw is the best. I wanted to invite him to James Fegan’s wedding, but Southpaw appearances are expensive as hell for someone without a job.
Roger Bossard: It makes sense that the groundskeeper would give you a jar of dirt, I guess? I’m not sure what the PK Game is, but if I had to guess it would be his final one at USCF. You also get to change the bases during a Sox game, which is pretty cool.
Jerry Reinsdorf: Ownership of the Chicago Bulls.
Lead Image Credit: Rick Osentoski // USA Today Sports Images